For some time, I never realized why there were so many experiences in life that I hadn't done yet. There's some philosophical question like, "What would you do if you weren't afraid?". I see so many people doing amazing things with their lives, and I wonder why I live in fear of putting myself out there and trying.
My boyfriend is extremely adventurous and has an optimistic outlook. He very rarely thinks anything will go wrong, and I'm the complete opposite. I think everything will go wrong. We had a weekend trip to the mountains, and I could tell he was getting frustrated with my apprehension about anything and everything slightly adventurous he suggested. It got quiet in the car for a moment, and I started getting angry with myself. Why can't I just have fun? Why can't I let go and try something new? Then, I remembered. It's because I'm scared.
Being overweight my whole life created a deeper questioning of myself. I tell myself that I'm not physically capable of doing a lot of things, and even worse, I worry too much about others will think if I do try. I tried to explain this to him, and he was as understanding as he could be without ever having experienced these things for himself. During that conversation, it hit me. I've been living a limited life because I choose to. I choose to believe that I can or cannot do certain things because of my physical condition. It keeps me from trying because I'm too afraid to put myself out there. Sure, I may get embarrassed or even fail. But, the older I'm getting, I realize how little time we do have to live our lives. Why live in fear? I should be tackling anything and everything that comes at me in life so that at the end of the day, I'll have no regrets. I won't look back and wish I'd tried something instead of fearing the result.
We are our own worst enemies. We are more capable and able than we give ourselves credit for, and we should quit doubting and fearing. We are worthy women that deserve a rich, full life. Go out there and start living it!